Home > General, My Story > What kind of soil are you?

What kind of soil are you?

I was reading an excellent blog posting here by Jeff Fisher. He knows the road to recovery. He writes a great blog about it at PornToPurity.com that you may want to bookmark it. He asks, “What is your goal [in recovery]?” It got me thinking about my goal … remaining faithful to God’s calling for the rest of my life. It means maintaining boundaries, doing heartwork, improving relationships and staying sexually pure until I die. It means being good soil.

Sexual purity - good soilIt you are in this for long you will see success and failure. The patterns remind me of the parable of the sower in Luke 8. Some seeds are sown on pavement, rocks, weedy soil and in good soil. Birds eat the seeds on the pavement. The seed that land on the rocks spring up but die quickly. Weeds choke the seedlings that grow at their feet. The only seeds that excel land in good soil. The parable is really about the state of our heart (the soil).

I have seen all four examples in my heart:

The pavement: I asked the question “Is masturbation really wrong?” and heard the radio programs about sexual sin and avoided them. The strategy is to ignore the message. A hard heart will not respond to the Spirit.

Rocky soil: I knew I needed to turn from this. I felt the pressure to change but wasn’t ready to let go of my way of coping. It’s common to get pressure from wives, friends, counselors, parents, employers or other people in our lives. We respond to get along. There is short-term success but lacking real motivation to do the hard work, it dies. Rocky hearts soon return to their old tricks.

Weedy soil: It’s having a deeper desire to quit but being afraid of the solution. I’ve found resolve isn’t all that counts. I also had to weed my soil. Weeds come in all shapes and sizes. Some weeds even look like good plants. Lack of honesty. Minimizing the real story. Secrecy. Double mindedness. Isolation. Not finding good support. Not fixing our baggage. It’s fear that the medicine is more bitter than the problem.

Good soil: Weeding the garden really helped. It you are like me, you have some trouble recognizing your own weeds. I had friends help me weed. I told a good, wise, spiritually mature, confidential friend. I got involved in a support group. Heartwork to deal with my stuff was key. I have seen guys pulling up the roots of self deception. Living honestly, setting up healthy boundaries. Getting in the Word and applying it in their lives. Spending consistent time in prayer. Helping others who are not as far along. Finding experts to help them. It’s a total commitment to water, fertilize and pull weeds for the rest of their lives.

What about you? What kind of soil are you? How will you respond? If you’re ready please email me. It’s free and confidential. I have never felt better, been more on track with the Lord or been more sexually pure. You can be too!

Categories: General, My Story
  1. June 21, 2010 at 10:06 am

    Good stuff VIP. I’ve not thought about the condition of our hearts and the four soils as it relates to addiction recovery.

    In the middle of my struggles, I had a false sense of blessing from the Lord. Even though my heart was rocky, I thought I was OK because God was not punishing me. In fact, I saw God working around me, in my family, in my church, and it seemed in my life. Turns out I was deceived.

    We serve a God who is good. We benefit everyday from his general goodness. He is merciful, slow to anger, and patient — or else we would all be dead. Just because God is not punishing me for my sexual sin directly doesn’t mean that I am OK. God was patiently waiting for the right time to pull the plug on my and help me come back to him.

    I hope I am good soil today.

    Stay strong my friend!

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